It’s almost February

and that means it’s time for a new focus. This one is easy. It’s my weight. I could also say it’s my health. Both are appropriate.

My weight has definitely gone up. I don’t weigh myself regularly (although that may change) but it’s clear from the way my clothes fit that I have gained weight. It starts off with the waistband of the pants or skirt not feeling right or the top that always slides on easily feeling off kilter. At first I think it’s because it’s just been washed or dry cleaned and that’s why it feels funny. One day you realize it’s happening with pretty much everything including your underwear and then it’s time to admit it’s not the laundering, it’s my body.

Even though I had bariatric surgery and have a small pouch instead of a football-sized stomach, it’s possible for it to stretch. Not all the way back to the original size but enough so that I can eat more than I could the first year after surgery. There’s a 5 day reset diet that I can follow that helps get things back to my new normal, and I need to find the paperwork and make that happen.

One of the most important steps I can take is to be present when I’m eating because it’s way too easy to eat beyond my pouch’s capacity. It’s physically uncomfortable when my pouch is full, but my head hunger doesn’t stop to think about that. It likes the taste of the food and the feeling of satisfying my emotional hunger. It takes such a small portion of food to satisfy my physical hunger, and I’ve gotten out of the habit of paying attention to it.

My physical body is in distress. The arthritis in my knees doesn’t like the extra weight and they hurt a lot more making walking and standing that much more uncomfortable.

I have two goals for this week: find the 5 day reset diet and make a plan to do it and get myself to the YMCA a block away from my office, rejoin and schedule an appointment with a personal trainer to work on a program. That should probably be the pool initially. In the water I can do a lot more than I can on dry land.

More to come …

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2 Responses to It’s almost February

  1. buddytd says:

    I like your focus on mindfulness. Although mindfulness is sort of becoming a cliche, it is very useful and important. FWIW, I totally support you in what you are doing, and hope that you find your way.

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